…and so the days went by, some faster than other ones. At times, she would look at the construction and only see a shapeless pile of rocks, a sight that frustrated her more and more every time. Then the rain came down, pouring like never before, and it would wash away her foundations over and over and over again. That’s how she realized that May had arrived, and how much she hated that time of the year. She got mad at the rain many times, for it made her feel even more nostalgic. She would stay up all night just fighting against it to keep the rocks in its place, freezing and crying and wishing she could have the heart’s light to keep her warm. But it only got more difficult as the days passed by. Her will was still strong, but her hands, back and eyes were tired… and her mind would betray her at times, and would make her imagine things that made her unease to the point she had no strength to work. She felt defeated and lost… because the one thing that terrified her more than the heart not making it to the shore safely, was that it arrived before the lighthouse was ready.

 She did not want to fail, but it became evident that she couldn’t do it on her own… and so, on a stormy night, she went under the thunders to make her peace with the higher power. She asked for forgiveness for her previous mistakes, for being so proud and so stubborn, and for every single thing that had turned her into that despicable thing she once was. And on her knees, she begged for a sign. A sign to keep trusting and waiting for the heart just like she had vowed… or a sign to give up and let it go forever. She promised she would obey either way, for she now accepted that anything to come would be for her own good… “All I ask for is a sign, and the wisdom to read it!” she cried.

 And just like that, the storm shut down and a great silence invaded the shore. The sky turned clear and a silent peace invaded her bones and every inch of her soul. A clear, blue beam lit up the horizon, followed by a strong beat that echoed like a lion’s roar all across the shore and the mountains behind it. She stood on her feet, closed her eyes and whispered “thank you”, as she wiped off her tears. She now had her sign, and the renewed strength she needed to resume her task.

 She finally realized she could not fight the rain, but she could find ways to build a stronger structure to stand it. She had to start practically from scratch after every attempt, but she knew every failure meant she was one step closer to finding the right way. She began to learn, and her hands, back and eyes became stronger with time. She learned to control her fears, and every time she began to feel insecure or impatient, she reminded herself that nothing could stop the heart from finding its way, or the lighthouse from rising tall and firm, as long as she had the higher power’s approval.

 And soon it became day 95… there was still no lighthouse, nor the heart had arrived. But this time, as she sat on the shore and contemplated the pile of rocks behind her, she realized the foundations were already there… not on the ground, but in her. She curled up in the sand and closed her eyes; and as she said a prayer, she pictured the wooden chest… her home, floating in the middle of the ocean… with her heart inside it, beating and shining like never before. “Right here” she whispered as she fell asleep…

the rays of light shine less and less each day… and the beat is barely audible anymore. i still trust, still build everyday despite how defeated my body or mind might feel at times. but each day it feels less and less tangible, and i cant help but wonder:  is home now just a place to visit in dreams?

…so she stood up, dusted herself off, cleaned up the wound and started walking again. It hurt for a while, but she had no time for pain. She had to keep going. And then, the unthinkable happened. She saw something shining inside a cave. It was a heart. A brand new heart. It was the most precious thing she hade ever seen, entirely made out of trust. Its beat was strong, so strong, that it could be heard from miles away. And it was so bright, that it lightened the entire forest with one beat.

But the sand storm was on its way, devouring everything that stood before it. And she had to run across the valley that lead to the higher ground in order to escape from it. It was a long journey, and a very dangerous one. She had battles to fight and she didn’t want to risk the treasure she had just found. She needed both hands to fight.

So she went down to the shore, grabbed some oak logs and built a small chest.  She then placed the heart in it, and closed it. She grabbed her knife and wrote the word “home” on the wood. She knew the wood was resistant enough to stand the weather and the time at sea; and the heart’s beat was strong enough to find its way down to the highland’s shore. She then vowed to build a lighthouse, a sanctuary where the heart could shine bright and light up the new land. And then, placed the chest on the water as she saw it float away. “A sacrifice worth making, for it its safe. I will hear its beat again, when the time is right” she said to herself. And with these words, she started her journey again.

The journey was indeed long, longer than she ever expected it to be. She got lost many times, and fought incredibly dangerous creatures. The wound on her chest had healed completely, leaving a large scar. But she learned to appreciate this scar, as a symbol of her own bravery and strength. And as the days turned into nights, she fell down many times, getting all sorts of scratches on her face, arms and legs. She would sleep in caves sometimes, but sometimes she wouldn’t sleep at all. She would cry at times for she was terrified of silence and darkness. But mostly, she would think of the heart. She would imagine its journey and would sometimes fear for the waves to sink the chest, or to take it to a different shore. But then she remembered its beat, and its shine. Sometimes, she could even swear she had heard an echo or a reflection of a ray of light… and these thoughts would keep her at ease.

She finally arrived to the new land. It was completely unexplored, but beautiful indeed, and it extended itself beyond the horizon. The air was fresh, and she knew she would be safe there. She was dying to start her new life there, but she knew she needed the heart’s light in order not to get lost. So she started building the foundations of the sanctuary. She wanted them to be as steady and reliable as they could possibly be, for she wanted the lighthouse to stand tall so it could light up all across the territory.  This new task, turned out to be even harder than her journey. But she would not complain, she was happy with even the smallest stone for it was a sign of her progress.

And at the end of every day, she would go sit on the shore, completely exhausted, and fall asleep waiting for her “home” to come back to her. “It is safe” she said… 

[Flash 9 is required to listen to audio.]

i dont have a favorite song, but if i did, this one would be it. specially this version.